Thoughts on Inauguration Day
Anonymous

This inauguration day is one that weighs heavy on my heart. I cannot bear to think about the future that awaits me and people like me. Over the next four years, I will try to remember what I love about this country; it feels as if every year that passes chips away at my remaining hope. People who I respect, who I aspire to emulate, keep reminding me that I must have hope, but honestly, I don’t know how. 
​
I don’t know how to stay positive with a president who gropes people like me, who openly mocks people like me. His actions normalize that kind of behavior, and I have to ask myself: what am I going to do if someone does these things to me? How will I respond? 

I want to say I’ll respond with honor and decorum, but it’s more likely that I’ll respond with self-hatred. I’ll find myself agreeing with the evil things that our president says about people like me. I already get these feelings from my own mind. Why not believe them from an outside source? Why not believe them from someone this country elected to the highest respected position? 

How do I pretend that the people who elected him care about me? People who I love and care for did elect this man. How do I grapple with the fact that their choices show a blatant disregard for my being? They argue that they elected someone whose values most align with their own. If that’s the case, I don’t think I can continue to associate with them. I can continue to love and value them as humans, but I cannot use the word friend. Friendship is built on mutual love, respect, and trust. If your values align with DT, you have none of those things towards me.  

I feel as if my perceptions of humans as a whole have been splintered. Part of me, the part my parents raised, wants to believe that people are just people: that we’re all doing the best we can. The other part of me looks on with a critical eye and says “if this is the best we can do, we’re not worth saving.” 


Edited by: Kara Mercer 

​A Spider in the Sink
 
It’s outpatient surgery
and she’s running late
trying to catch a spider
 
in the kitchen sink.
Wants to carry it outside
before her boyfriend wakes
 
and crushes it.
Then she has a long drive
to the clinic and hopes
 
this will be her last visit.
Her boyfriend lied
about having
 
that procedure.
She found out the hard way,
shouldn’t have let him back in.
 
 
Donal Mahoney

Colorado Dream by Charlene Whitman
Review by: Maddy D.
​
About the Book:
Yearning to become a concert musician, a young woman from New York travels to Colorado to purchase a violin, but when she meets a wild, untamable cowboy, her dream is threatened and her heart torn ...

In New York in 1877, Angela Bellini longs to become a concert violinist and get away from her abusive father. When her dream takes her to Greeley, Colorado, to purchase a violin from a master instrument maker, she learns she must wait three weeks until her violin is ready before she can head home.

Angela is determined not to let anything or anyone waylay her dream, but when she meets rough-and-tumble cowboy Brett Hendricks, her heart is torn. He is her opposite in every way—uncouth, cocky, and reckless. But she is hopelessly drawn to him, like a moth to flame.

Brett Hendricks is on the run—not just from an angry rancher who is tracking him down for shooting his son but from a dark and troubled past plaguing him with guilt and shame. A wild, untamable cowboy, Brett can break any horse with a soft touch and soothing word, but nothing in the world can bring him peace. He fears he will never stop running, never see his dreams of ranching realized.

But then, one evening, he hears sweet violin music that seeps deep into his soul--music that floods him with peace. He falls hard for Angela but knows she plans to leave Colorado. All his attempts to win her heart fail disastrously, and though he buries himself in the cattle roundup, when he helps thwart a rustling outfit, his enemies multiply.

Somehow he must find a way to gain Angela's heart and trust. And somehow Angela must break past her distrust of men to discover the love awaiting her with open arms.

Colorado Dream is the fourth installment in The Front Range Series of sweet historical Western romance novels by Charlene Whitman.

My Review:
Before I dive too deeply into this review, let me say that I generally do not pick up romance novels in any form, unless they just so happen to apart of some larger plot. So, if you’re into the Hallmark style of romantic stories, with all the classic various clichés, PG-13 graphic content and everything turns out happily ever after at the end, this story will probably be one you will enjoy. It is also one of those books in a series that stand nicely on their own. I have not read any of the previous books in the series, and it didn’t reference to anything outside of the book. So if you like this style of story, don’t fret about it being in a series. That doesn't hold much weight here.

I gave this book a chance because I enjoy historical fiction- especially the time period this story takes place in. The beginning continued that by being fairly interesting- still pretty cliché but interesting- enough to where I wanted to keep reading.  I couldn’t tell you now where that exactly took a dive. The author has a way of describing things, music especially, that is really well written. You can see the effort in the way the characters and world is built that some research went into learning about the time period and place.   

Unfortunately that is overshadowed by the author’s other decisions. One of the oddest ones, was the decision to write in a “cowboy twang” when describing thoughts, places or events from the perspective of any of the cowboys. If it had been curbed down to just the dialogue and thoughts of the character, that might have made the regional dialect easier to deal with. Since it wasn’t, all the “cowboy” character types became cookie cutter and obnoxious to read through. If it wasn’t for their names, you wouldn’t be able to tell one from the other.

The author also chose to repeat various plot points and character fears every time a chapter was written in their perspective. I lost count of how many chapters ended with the main male trying to “run from his life” or the main female still lost in the aftermath of her decisions. She was constantly afraid of the man she was falling for was like her father- mean, controlling and abusive. She lamented on the outcome of getting a violin when she apparently didn’t have the ability to think through the probabilities beforehand. Simple things, like how angry that controlling, abusive man would be. Where she would stay. How she would support herself. Which made her come off to me, as the reader, as a whiny, selfish child that wasn’t in any way self-sufficient. That might have been just how her character was, but since she didn’t grow from it and everything just so happened to work out wonderfully for her right in the nick of time, it turned into something that wasn’t easy to put aside.  I grew to be annoyed at her very quickly.

He, likewise, was constantly afraid of not being good enough for her, and also of having an uncontrollable aggressive side that we are reminded of literally from the first page starting his perspective. Like her, his intro into the story was actually nice. I enjoyed it, he hadn’t become annoying just yet. It wears off rather quickly once he met Angela- the main girl. Aside from nearly every chapter where he’s trying to run from his feelings, he’s also completely entranced in the idea of her. The reader gets to live this circle for nearly every page of the story, if not every chapter, except for the reprieve where some new minor character perspectives, who do not really add much to the story, are randomly tossed in. As well in the end, where everything is a happily ever after situation. Granted, that was the whole real point of the story, not the girl getting her violin and making a life for herself, so that much I forgive. However, the constant reminder of their feelings, the way the author expressed the “cowboy twang” and the constant very cliché metaphors and similes, dulled down the writer’s style into one that felt like a newer writer’s attempt, not someone who is five books into a series.

The plot is fast paced and has a lot of action that just so conveniently plays out.  Unfortunately all the previous mentioned problems make it boring and difficult to connect to the characters; it doesn’t help that most of those situations are clichés in themselves as well (though some of it’s forgiven because it is a historical romantic western) like one instance where rattlesnakes apparently roam in massive groups, just waiting to attack you. That at least lightened the annoyance by making me laugh through the entire scene.  

All in all, if you’re into this type of book, you’ll probably love it. It has everything going for it to be one of those afternoon or evening pick-me-up on a whim little romance stories. I just am not the target audience.
 Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book for free in exchange for writing a review. I was not obligated to give a positive review, and all thoughts are my own.

About the Author:
The author of "heart-thumping" Western romance, Charlene Whitman spent many years living on Colorado's Front Range. She grew up riding and raising horses, and loves to read, write, and hike the mountains. She attended Colorado State University in Fort Collins as an English major. She has two daughters and is married to George "Dix" Whitman, her love of thirty years.

The Front Range series of sweet historical Western romance novels (set in the 1870s) includes Colorado Promise, set in Greeley, Colorado; Colorado Hope, set in Fort Collins; Wild Secret, Wild Longing, which takes readers up into the Rockies, Colorado Dream (Greeley), and Wild Horses, Wild Hearts, set in Laporte and Greeley.

​Those Good Tomatoes
 
          Chicago, South Side
 
Late July and I am waiting
for those good tomatoes
brought to the city from farms
on trucks with a swinging scale,
brought to the city
and into the alleys
by Greeks and sons
in late July
and early August,
tomatoes so red they reign
on the sills of my mind all winter
too perfect to eat.
 
 
Donal Mahoney

​At a Bank of Elevators
 
Reunions can happen
and leave you speechless.
I’m standing at a bank
 
of elevators in a hospital
going to visit my wife
when a wheelchair rolls up
 
carrying my internist
from years ago.
An excellent doctor
 
who retired to teach,
according to rumors.
Now he’s pushed by a woman
 
I assume is his wife.
She looks sad
and he looks worse.
 
He asks how I’m doing
and I say not bad.
I ask how he’s doing
 
and he says he’s dying.
And adds that he hopes
I never have to.
 
He says he never realized 
despite his patients 
dying could be so hard.
 
 
Donal Mahoney

​Spam in My Inbox
 
Fancy spam emails
I don’t mind nor the ones
cobbled in broken English
 
from someone who says
he’s with a bank overseas
and is holding money for me
 
if I will send a small token
to show my good faith.
No, the spam emails
 
that bother me
are the ones that use
the names of people
 
I know well, like my daughter.
Those emails I’d like to answer.
We were close before she died.
 
 
Donal Mahoney

​A Good-Hearted Editor
 
He publishes poems
by writers who find
no publishers elsewhere.
 
They suffer rejection
and he gives them hope.
Some improve
 
and some do not.
But hope isn't always
the best thing.
 
It’s not hopeful to tell
a child with clubfoot
to take ballet.
 
 
Donal Mahoney
 

LIVING WITH MEMORY ISSUES
by Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW

This world is tough to navigate for someone with memory issues. When friends and family don’t understand what’s going on, it causes relationship issues. Forget a child’s ballgame or recital? The child gets upset and thinks you didn’t care enough to go. The other parent may also get upset and think you’re being neglectful or selfish. When this happens, not only are you, the sufferer, dealing with your own guilt over missing something important to your child, but now you’re having to deal with your family’s disappointment and accusations as well. Forget a birthday or anniversary? Forget something your spouse told you yesterday? If he or she reacts to this in anger and frustration, possibly making accusations, your self-esteem can plummet.

Work performance can suffer when someone is experiencing memory issues. They often make mistakes on the job which can lead to them getting fired. Though you are not required by law to disclose any diagnosis to your employer, some openness and honesty about your situation goes a long way. If coworkers know what’s going on with you, they can help pick up the slack. Your Human Resources department should also be made aware of any condition that may interfere with your performance at work. If they are aware that something is going on, it is possible that you could be transferred to a position that is easier to handle, be given a lighter workload, or have your hours reduced. Your job can work with you to an extent as long as they’re aware of what’s going on, although it’s not reasonable to expect them to always cover for you or excuse your mistakes. If you have an intermittent illness that affects your memory or performance, you can utilize FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act) in some cases to take time off until your normal functioning returns. Plan ahead for if/when the time comes that you can no longer function at work and need to look into applying for disability.

Forgetting a doctor’s appointment can get you written down as a “no show” and there may be a charge for not giving them 24 hours’ notice. You can reschedule, but it may be weeks before your next appointment rolls around. That’s a long time to wait when you’re having issues affecting your daily life that need to be seen to. Even worse with specialists, it can often be months before you can get in to see them. If you miss too many appointments, they can “fire” you as a patient for noncompliance. They may label you as noncompliant for other reasons as well, such as forgetting to take your medication as prescribed. Maybe you accidentally take it too often because you forgot you already took it earlier. Maybe you forget to take it at all because you can’t remember if you already did or not. Maybe you forget to refill your prescriptions on time so you’re not able to take them for a few days until you can get to the pharmacy. When you give vague answers to your medical providers, it raises a red flag in their mind that something is off. You could find yourself mistakenly labeled as noncompliant, attention-seeking, drug-seeking, etc. It is extremely important for you to be as open and honest with your doctor as you can about your memory issues. You want them on your side, not working against you because of a misinterpretation of your actions.

Find a support group! There are others out there who are going through the same thing as you, or something similar. It helps to talk to people who understand what you’re going through. You may not get validation and support from those closest to you, but you can get it from people in similar situations. They may also have some tips and tricks for you that helped them deal with their symptoms.

It can sometimes be a sign of something else going on with your body. Memory loss doesn’t usually happen on its own, especially in younger people. Elderly dementia happens, of course, but most of the time there’s something else going on, the memory issues simply a symptom of a larger problem. There are many mental health and physical health issues that can lead to brain fog, memory loss, and decrease in cognitive function, either permanently or intermittently. Getting officially diagnosed and receiving proper treatment can greatly improve all symptoms of your illness, not just the memory issues. Unfortunately, many individuals go for years without a diagnosis, so be your own advocate and don’t give up on getting to the bottom of your health issues. Enlist someone you trust who can help you remember your appointments, write down your symptoms, and go to appointments with you. Forgetting to tell the doctor some of your symptoms makes it that much harder for him or her to come to a proper diagnosis.

Be prepared at all times. Wear a medical alert bracelet or carry a card in your purse or wallet. Keep a list of all medications and be sure that list is current. If you have intermittent memory loss, or intermittent difficulty with speech, this should be written down and kept in a place that emergency personnel can easily find. If you’re unable to tell them what your allergies are, what medications you’re on, or what your medical diagnosis is, there is a risk of emergency personnel giving you something harmful. Therefore, it is important for them to be able to look at your bracelet or a card in your wallet to get this information in case you’re unable to tell them.  Keep your emergency contacts listed and up to date as well.

Plan for long-term care before you need it. Don’t leave that decision up to your loved ones to make. Too many people wait until it’s too late to make any plans. Choose a person that you trust to make decisions for you and designate them your Power of Attorney for when the time comes that you need someone else to be your decision maker. Tell them while you still are of sound mind what your wishes are so they can carry them out on your behalf. Your family may not want to talk about things like this so you may have to be the one to bring it up.  Their emotional burden will be eased if they have your help making plans while you still are able. 

Four Things to Remember When Dealing with Someone Who Has Memory Issues or “Brain Fog”

​By Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW

1. Don’t treat them like they’re stupid. When someone develops memory loss, this doesn’t affect their intelligence level. Whatever their intelligence before the memory loss was, it still is. It is rude and hurtful to treat them as if their lack of memory about something equates to lack of intelligence. They’re just as smart as they were before their memory or cognitive issues set in. Treating them as if they’re stupid will only upset them and make things worse.
2. They aren’t being lazy, neglectful, or noncompliant. They truly don’t remember! Saying things like “I just told you this a few minutes ago” or “yes we did discuss this last week” is not going to help anything, and is quite upsetting to them. There’s something organic going on in their body that affects their ability to recall certain things. It’s not their fault; they’re not doing these things on purpose. They’re just as upset about what’s going on as you are.
   
3. Sometimes the impairment comes and goes. Intermittent cognitive impairment can be even more difficult to deal with. If your loved one gets a diagnosis of dementia or Alzheimer’s, receives a brain injury, has a stroke, or suffers from any number of things that may lead to a permanent change in cognitive functioning, that’s hard to deal with at first. Usually family and friends are able to adjust to the new reality and learn how to deal with it better. When it’s something that comes and goes, however, it’s more difficult for most people to understand. There are many things that can result in temporary memory loss or cognitive impairment. TIA’s, also called mini-strokes, can cause stroke-like symptoms that include cognitive impairment; but this clears up after a time. Some migraine sufferers experience memory loss during their migraines and seizures could also cause temporary memory problems. There are many neurological conditions that could cause temporary memory loss while in the middle of an episode. There are also many autoimmune conditions that can result in memory loss and impairment during flare ups. For these individuals, they function normally most of the time, but experience symptoms only during “episodes” or “flares” of their condition. It is important for you to learn all you can about your loved one’s condition, and learn the signs of a new flare or episode so you can be prepared to help them out during that time.
4. Fear, shame, and guilt can often be expressed as anger. Anger outbursts are common in people with memory issues. When someone is accustomed to being high-functioning, it is scary to them when they realize their memory is slipping. When people are scared, they tend to lash out. Family members often make the situation worse when their response is to accuse the person of purposefully doing something wrong. They may feel shame and embarrassment because of their lapses in memory and try to cover it up or blow it off rather than admit they’re having memory problems. When confronted, they can turn angry and also guilt about how their memory issues are affecting their family. How you react to them often escalates their anger. Becoming educated on how to interact with them in a way that is non-blaming and non-judgmental could help you not to escalate anything further. You owe it to yourself and your loved one to treat them with dignity and respect, especially in trying times. 

About the Author: Kristi King-Morgan is a social worker and psychotherapist with a trauma-informed and strengths based therapeutic approach. Kristi currently holds a position as a medical social worker and provides crisis intervention to patients and families, which includes psychoeducation and self-care strategies for patients with chronic illness, injury, and aging issues, and self-care strategies to families/caregivers. 

​A Stranger in the Soup Kitchen Spills the Beans
 
I have a friend, old and retired, who keeps busy helping the poor. Let's call him Ted because he wants to remain anonymous. Some of his ideas, he says, wouldn’t make many of his neighbors happy.
 
Ted has had problems of his own in life. No need to list them. He managed to survive them. As a result, he knows what the poor are up against. And he believes that in 2017 their plight will be worse in the United States and elsewhere in the world. Bigger odds are piling up against them.
 
It won’t be any easier for Ted, either, now a solid member of the lower-middle class having escaped a life of poverty. For example, he has always wondered why car insurance, house insurance, estimated taxes and property taxes all come due in November and December. He says it's like having the Grinch chew on his posterior during the holidays. 
 
While his income in retirement remains stagnant, his bills, Ted says, are always rising.  Fortunately, he and his wife have planned ahead over the years and have been able to make things work despite modest salaries and even a more modest retirement income. They may not eat steak but they still have enough left to donate something more than their time to charity.
 
But every time Ted pays a bill he thinks about the stranger he met at the local soup kitchen where he volunteers as a server two days a week. The man was eating by himself as usual. Ted had finished his time behind the steam table, approached the man and asked if he could sit down and talk with him.
 
The stranger said okay and it only took a few minutes for he and Ted to get along. Ted said the stranger probably would have talked to anyone who sat down. He obviously needed to talk.
 
Eventually the stranger told Ted the current chapter in his life story. It wasn’t a pretty thing to hear. But his life today may be typical of what many of the poor and elderly are living with now. And this is not happening in some Third World country. It’s happening in the United States, where people from other nations want to live.
 
The stranger said he can't afford his little house and laughed slightly when he said he was too old for a tent. He lives in one of the row houses built after World War II. He said utilities, taxes and insurance make it hard to stay there. Not much left for food or prescriptions. He also has a bit of a heart problem. Nothing that taking his medication regularly can’t keep in check.
 
Being alone is difficult enough, the stranger said, but the hot lunches at the soup kitchen help him pay his other bills. This is his only hot meal of the day unless you count an egg in the morning with a slice of toast. Otherwise he snacks on crackers and cheese. And the cheese is free, he said, given away once a month by another charity over on the other side of town.
 
Listening to the stranger, Ted felt very fortunate. He and his wife have always been able to pay their bills. They eat well enough, nothing fancy, and they dine out once every two weeks at a fast food restaurant. Chicken fingers with a rainbow of sauces. However, Ted has new concerns about the stranger and the other poor in his community and throughout American society. He has heard that a new tax plan is being considered by Congress, a tax plan that will force a worker with a spouse and two children to pay taxes if their income is $12,000.
 
Ted would hate to have to live on $12,000 if he were by myself much less with a wife and two children.
 
He says that as the middle class continues to evaporate and the poor continue to get poorer, he finds less empathy at his level and above for either group and he doesn’t expect that to improve in 2017.
 
America's old people, he says, are truly up against the wall. As time goes by, he thinks their problems will grow more severe. He doesn’t know what the poor and elderly will do if that new tax plan becomes law. And he thinks that in 2017 the time is ripe for that to happen in Washington.
 
Ted admits many people spend too much of what little they have and don’t worry about their future, But in his volunteer work, he finds many of the poor spend what little they have to get to the future.
 
Some things, Ted says, are worth writing to one’s representatives in government about. He has already written to his senators and his representative about this restrictive tax law and hopes it won’t pass. He hopes other Americans will write to their representatives as well.
 
He thinks there will be plenty of other opportunities to write letters in 2017 and the years ahead to help stop potential laws like this.
 
The electorate has spoken, he says, and it will be awhile before they have a chance to speak again.
 
 
Donal Mahoney