by
Nicholas L. Alexander
A triggered intention to delay sobriety has become her daily dilemma. Suicidal notes help her cope with manic depression and a drug-seeking obsession depleting her of hope. However, the new malicious promoter is now present: money. And she has none in her pocket, not even a red cent. She’s prison bound and, perhaps, a soul that can never be found; she’s on a self-indulging murdering spree to kill herself, which has her putting one foot in the grave. Her family is full of spite and anger, and their rage has become their enabler. Their added pressure makes life and reality beyond intolerable. There is no room to be brave, and the dope has become her enforcer.
However, getting sober and reaching the same divine origin seen in her mother becomes the new lethal drug. After seeing strength and not finding fear in her eyes, there is no reason to let go and die. Too many times she has sat there wanting to cry. Too many times she has sat there thinking that reality would never allow her to be a giving wife. But there’s too much corruption that fills a drug-fueled life; she seems to never be complete, unless she is thinking of being six feet deep.
She has a sick mind that’s constantly being left to fend for itself. “No, this cannot be the end,” she thinks, as she stares into her own eyes; the eyes of the one who beholds her defeat. This daily poisonous treat is no longer going to profit. She was caught in a constant ring of fire: if she did not get clean, her time would have been ready to expire. But there is a readiness that takes over, and gives you a chance to retire. So she made a deal and the addiction was no longer obeyed.
Brought in by the more nightmarish superior, an artificial intelligence dominates the nasty minds of the inferior. This is the new age of the dilute mind. An entitled hype has come true for those who always sought after speculation of the truth. And what a drastic measure to live in a world of power and retaliation, where reproductions of the inferior are made and the highly intelligent create frustration.
BIO - My name is Nicholas L. Alexander, and I am from NE, Ohio. I am 32 years old, and have been through many years of drug/alcohol addiction. I have outlived the addiction, but have lost many great friends along the way; I’ve experienced life from a more wicked perspective. And, even though this affliction has affected me in so many negative ways, it has risen me through the ashes. I am currently a student majoring is creative writing, and I hope to be a professional writer one day. I want to write as much as I can about the horrors of addiction, and the life it leads so many down.
Edited by Basma Amer