'A Debate Before the Debate' by Donal Mahoney

​A Debate Before the Debate
 
A woman was seated next to me
as we waited for the debate to start.
The candidates were late taking the stage.
 
She said she shouldn't have come
because she couldn’t vote for either man.
Neither of them, she said, believes
 
men and women are equal.
She asked what did I, as a man, think.
Are the sexes equal or not?
 
I gripped the armrests and said men
and women are equal but different
just as dogs and cats are different
 
but I meant no comparison.
I could tell she was not impressed
with my response. Then she asked
 
how I thought men and women
were different and I said I thought
a woman would do almost
 
anything for love and man
almost anything for sex,
present company excluded.
 
Her mouth fell open.
I could tell she was ready
to set me straight but when
 
the candidates came on stage,
I thought I heard an Abyssinian meow
while I stifled a Great Dane bark.
 
 
Donal Mahoney